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    • September 14, 2020 10:33 AM BST
    • I wear various colours, I like to match my underwear to whatever outfit I am wearing.

    • July 2, 2020 10:27 AM BST
    • i'm a PINK gurl, so naturally i prefer pink panties. pink is my favorite color, period. however, i have worn other colors also.

    • September 7, 2020 6:45 AM BST
    • "I do agree with Hannah though for ones own personal happiness and contentment people with a genuine gender identity problem should elect to go all the way."

      It is indeed, as the title says, not that simple. I lost everyone I called a friend and my entire family overnight when I came out as trans. Since then, I made a lot of new friends only to lose all of them (99% of them overnight as well) whenthe first new friend and person I cared about and thought of as if they were family betrayed me and despite all that we went through together and all that I went through up til then because of and for her cost me my career and turned those new friends against me. I have lost every connection to everyone that I ever had and at my age and location there isn't much of a possibility of me finding anyone with whom to make new ones. I am much more comfortable being the new me than before I started transitioning, or at least I was before the stress, depression, and isolation left me with a heart problem and my physical appearance went to shit. Now I hate my body as much as I did before, I am broke and jobless and spent years trying to find a jobsince losing mine and the one after because of that former friend too, I have zero connections to anyone, and I went through a large number of extremely traumatic events that I wouldn't have gone through if I hadn't transitioned. My gender dysphoria was lessened slightly by HRT but I will never be able to afford GCS/SRS or which ever you refer to it as because it would all be out of pocket. Plus, there isn't an electrolysis person within 150 kilometers of me after the one here randomly quit one day and I wanted to get follicle transplant for the balding areas I had that didn't regrow enough to hide them from medication alone.

      This is why I said not to transition. I was miserable before transitioning but I had the means to survive and people to spend time with to have some sort of connection to outside of the internet. Now I am miserable, alone, broke, broken, with no direction or any idea what to do about any of that because I have tried everything I can think of several times and the only thing I got in return was a slightly reduced feeling of gender dysphoria.

      Shana aka the Don't Transition mentioned

    • August 11, 2020 9:57 PM BST
    • Quote Hannah Louise;

      ''Sorry but, I find it horrifying that someone would purposely call themselves 'Don't Transition'
      If they have experienced a nasty response from being transgender then, I'm sorry but, nobody should even suggest that something so important to an individual with Gender Dysphoria who, has no other option than to transition, is a bad decision to make, just because of their own experiences. Being Trans myself, I can only say that, I've had nothing but support, admiration and positive for the life changing decision I made and, I'm so happy that I went through with it.

      Whilst I admire Hannah Louise, not all of us are blessed with supportive friends and family in the beginning of transition, I have shared my childhood horrors with a few close friends on here. losing my immediate family at a very young age destroyed me. Being what I was did not earn me many real close friends, then there was no empathy or support at school, some would say I was very lucky to look like I do, did. I do agree with Hannah though for ones own personal happiness and contentment people with a genuine gender identity problem should elect to go all the way.

      I was born with a condition, Reifensteins Syndrome, started developing breast at the age of 14, fortunately I was then living with my court appointed guardian, who was understanding of my penchant for wanting to be female, supported me and took me to see councillors eventually just before my 16th birthday I was refereed to Addenbrooks Gene Clinic where I was diagnosed with my condition. At the clinic I met a person with a similar condition she was 14, her parents had her put on a regime of testosterone and steroids, and forced her to have a mastectomy, but it did not change her yearnings and needs, Hannah's main point I think is important, there is no cure, days gone by when electric shock treatment aversion therapy was applied, nothing worked or changed how a person felt about their gender.

      The most important thing though is to remember that not everyone's circumstances are the same, is it easier to transition when one is older, with experience of life and can adopt an attitude to deal with transition, but then life can be complicated with attitudes from work colleagues, friends and relationships based on loyalty and responsibilities, or like me young immature and vulnerable doing a lot of sordid things seeking recognition acceptance and wanting to be loved for what I was.

    • June 28, 2020 12:01 PM BST
    • Oh, honey, I try to be a gentle, sweet female! Of course, there are times when my passion goes overboard! I could be a sweet , excited lover, at times!
      Roxanne Lanyon

    • June 28, 2020 11:10 AM BST
    • <blockquote><strong><a href="/se4/profile/Roxanne70">Roxanne Lanyon</a> said:</strong><br />I used to enjoy the feel of a pretty dress occasionally, years and years ago. But now, I have aged a bit, and want to enjoy the feel of an understanding and loving man! I think I could make him so happy, and be a very sweet, gentle spouse for him.
      Lord, I would love that, so much!
      Roxanne Lanyon, A Woman at Heart</blockquote><br />

      Admit it your a Hussey! lol

    • June 28, 2020 10:59 AM BST
    • I used to enjoy the feel of a pretty dress occasionally, years and years ago. But now, I have aged a bit, and want to enjoy the feel of an understanding and loving man! I think I could make him so happy, and be a very sweet, gentle spouse for him.
      Lord, I would love that, so much!
      Roxanne Lanyon, A Woman at Heart

    • June 28, 2020 10:43 AM BST
    • Can always tell the Bent ones as they always walk round in circles!

    • June 10, 2020 5:20 PM BST
    • I am a straight Crossdresser and I just love the clothes and the feeling wearing them, I have a foot out the closet, my wife found my stash a month ago, but has not brought it up in conversation or in her attitude.

    • November 5, 2019 5:17 PM GMT
    • I was straight for years, but that changed when we became a triad with a good man. Milady enjoys the attention; often I'm enfemme and that still makes her the centre of attention, but it also give Himself two girls to sully. And I totally love being his little slut, he's eight inches taller and fifty pounds heavier, it's amazing.

      That said, I spend very little time with other trannies, don't have any interest in most guys (though I do appreciate a sharp-dressed-man), and have no use whatsoever for queer males.

    • June 9, 2020 10:01 AM BST
    • Teacher in primary school is asking all the children what their fathers jobs are.

      One little boy, shouts out my dads a plumber.
      Another little boy shouts out my dads an electrician.
      Yet another one, shouts out my dads a chef.
      Only boy out of 25 who does'nt offer any information on what his fathers job was, was Johnny.

      Teacher asks johnny what does your father do Johnny.

      Johnny reluctantly , replies, he is a tranny lap dancer in a
      gay club after work he goes into the car park and does blow jobs for money. ,

      At lunch break, Johnny's best friend pulls him to one side and asks, why did you lie about your dad being a tranny lap dancer in a gay club

      johnny replies, how could I tell the whole class he plays football for England

    • May 24, 2020 5:09 PM BST
    • markets, charity shops or department store. Or you can click &amp; collect from Argos or an Amazon locker. the home of fine corsetry

    • May 10, 2020 8:33 PM BST
    • always shop in person (as "Helene") including underwear and ofcourse try them in the ladies fiiting room - specially like Debenhams and M+S in U.K for shopping

    • December 29, 2019 7:59 AM GMT
    • I mostly shop for lingerie and hosiery, so I prefer to go to an actual brick and mortar store. One of the challenges of my wife not knowing I dress is that I can't order online and I pay cash.

    • April 21, 2020 6:32 PM BST
    • I just read this on another site and the thought has really intrigued me. Why wouldn't every man want to be a woman? As for me, the answer is, I do but am unable to be right now. I would like to grow my breasts but I still con only present as a male and don't know how to keep them from showing. Thanks for reading.

    • November 14, 2019 9:33 AM GMT
    • You welcomed me as you did others, you nurtured me as you did others, you watched me grow, others too. Later, you helped me with my events, my extra pair of eyes.
      To hear of your passing has left a huge hole in my heart, and the hearts of so many more.
      I'd say shine bright in the night sky, but I get the feeling you'll be going down rather than up lol.
      Keep the fires burning hot down there, keep the subs on their toes, and I'll be down to raise more hell with you before you know it. Albeit in a mini dress :-) the side of me you never got to see or know. Will miss you xx

    • March 29, 2020 1:46 PM BST
    • Cristine Jennifer Shye. BL

      2342 1‚ 0
      Article from the UK LAW Society (The Times)
      Luck certainly wasn’t a lady for transvestite, Paul Hurst recently when he was rejected from a casino for being dressed ‘inappropriately’. Last month ‘The Age’ reported from Australia in its article, ‘Stuck Between a Frock and a Card Place’ that transvestite, Paul Hurst or Anne Marie to his friends had been asked to leave a casino because of his appearance. Australian lawyers are now debating whether transvestites are protected in law.
      Dressed in one of his best frocks, Mr Hurst was photographed in a glamorous sequined dress partying at the launch of Priscilla, Queen Of The Desert at Star City's Lyric Theatre. A month later he and a friend again donned their dresses for a night out the casino's new spin-off bar, Priscilla's. Unfortunately Mr Hurst found his way barred by 2 bouncers on the night. A security guard had deemed him to be a &amp;amp;amp;amp;quot;man&amp;amp;amp;amp;quot; and &amp;amp;amp;amp;quot;inappropriately dressed&amp;amp;amp;amp;quot; when he was refused entry to the casino at 9.15 on the night of November 1, 2006.
      Mr Hurst, of Coogee, filed an action alleging the casino has discriminated against him because of his sexual gender and was refused service and asked to leave. Mr Hurst told the panel of the Administrative Decisions Tribunal (Equal Opportunity Division), that &amp;amp;amp;amp;quot;I have always regarded myself as a woman and lived my life as a woman,&amp;amp;amp;amp;quot;
      The casino changed it’s stance at the initial hearing claiming that that Mr Hurst was &amp;amp;amp;amp;quot;wearing an extremely short skirt that barely covered his groin region, white underwear and garters … were visible&amp;amp;amp;amp;quot;. Previous evidence provided stated however, that it was Mr Hurst’s friend, &amp;amp;amp;amp;quot;Russell&amp;amp;amp;amp;quot; who was inappropriately dressed in the short red skirt and white pants and garters, and that Mr Hurst had been welcome to stay.
      Deputy president of the Administrative Decisions Tribunal, Nancy Hennessy granted an order to obtain a copy of the casino's security video of the incident. The solicitor for the casino told Mr Hurst that under the Anti-Discrimination Act the tribunal can only hear transgender cases.
      &amp;amp;amp;amp;quot;The Anti-Discrimination Act does not protect transvestites, it protects transsexuals, but you said you live as a woman,&amp;amp;amp;amp;quot; Ms Hennessy said. &amp;amp;amp;amp;quot;Before the tribunal can hear the case what you have to be able to prove to the court is that sexually you are a transsexual.&amp;amp;amp;amp;quot;
      The parties have been asked to reappear before the tribunal in July to resolve the matters.
      In the UK, Discrimination against transsexuals in an employment or vocational context has been unlawful in Britain since 1st May 1999 (under the Sex Discrimination (Gender Reassignment) Regulations 1999, SI 1999/1102).
      Discrimination against homosexuals (ie discrimination on grounds of sexual orientation) in an employment or vocational context became unlawful in Britain on 1st December 2003 (under the Employment Equality (Sexual Orientation) Regulations 2003 SI 2003/1661. Even before May 1999 (for transgender persons) or December 2003 (for homosexuals) a person who had been discriminated against on grounds of change of sex or on grounds of sexual orientation could in appropriate circumstances claim for a breach of human rights under the Human Rights Convention. The Gender Recognition Act 2004. allows people who change sex the right to marry in their acquired gender and be given new birth certificates that recognise the acquired gender.
      Although the law has not been tested with regards to transvestites it would seem that they do not fall into either strict category of trans gender or necessarily homosexual. This is not to say that a company which allows staff to bully their colleagues will not fall foul of the law. It is important for companies to introduce anti bullying and harassment training and policies covering the treatment of transvestites to avoid facing tribunal proceedings.

      By Charles Price, barrister No5 Chambers

      On 6 Apr 2013, at 21:10, Cristine Jennifer Shye wrote:
      ''Hi Christine
      Lovely to hear from you Please be my guest., Always interested in your work.
      Meet up again soon, do lunch
      Best wishes Charles''


      Former Member
      Hi Cristine
      I read this as a test case that you would consider defending when you finally take the bar exam. (Is that what its called?)
      However, the article is misleading because it sets up a premise of anti-transvestite discrimination when in fact it simply rests on a breach of the Code of Dress criteria. It would be a rare anomaly here to see blatant discrimination, especially in Sydney, against our gay culture which the majority of us are justifiably proud of.

      The real issue, which becomes the back story of the article, is the thoughtless and reckless presentation of Anne Marie's friend Russell who seems would have caused some disruption and disconsternation among the other patrons.

      However, what this example shows is the gender variant community is not immune to stupidity. Being transsexual or transvestite doesn't confer one with a higher intelligence quotient.
      Cristine Jennifer Shye. BL

      2342 1‚ 0
      Chalice, the first paragraph was a summation by an eminent Barrister. for consideration as a point of law. The subject is the appeared exclusion of transvestites,note the various aspects regarding laws in the UK regarding Transsexuals and Gays were noted and covered.
      This post was edited by Cristine Jennifer Shye. BL at May 15, 2013 11:49 am BST
      Former Member

      Cristine, I got that.

      Australian lawyers are now debating whether transvestites are protected in law.

      The treatment of transvestites in Law is a necessary consideration but my attention was drawn to the surreptitious way in which the issue was raised.
      Personally, I don't have any claim to transvestitism but I can empathise with the causes and issues that can arise and I support the right of legal protections.
      Cristine Jennifer Shye. BL
      2342 1‚ 0
      Interesting news item here in the UK, Several police forces have now at their discression included goths and other diverse groups when reporting hate crime.This is not included in law, as to if the DPPS would go as far as endorsing the police authorities decions is debatable. Just as I said before, all the laws, medical directives do no specifically mention transvestites.
      .Former Member
      TO Cristine
      I have found several parallel sources for your OP.
      Are you aware of the copyright on this article at ?
      You simply need to reference the article.
      However, I make note of the current legal position in Australia. Firstly, &amp;amp;amp;amp;quot;Crossdresser&amp;amp;amp;amp;quot;, &amp;amp;amp;amp;quot;Transvestite&amp;amp;amp;amp;quot; or &amp;amp;amp;amp;quot;Transgendered Person&amp;amp;amp;amp;quot; are terms used to describe a person who regularly takes on the appearance of the opposite sex in order to satisfy a deep personal need. We use and prefer the term &amp;amp;amp;amp;quot;Crossdresser&amp;amp;amp;amp;quot; as it is less limited and coloured by common usage. Above all, however, a Crossdresser is a real person.
      And more to the point, the legal standpoint towards transvestities is clear and unencumbered:
      There is nothing in the act of Crossdressing that offends any law in mainland Australia or in most of the world. Most major religions do not consider the act of Crossdressing immoral.
      In light of these findings the article as reported in The Australian Age newspaper is non sequitur. The Barrister simply does not have an issue and would be on a fool's hunt. Neither can any claim be made to a justifiable grievance against transvestites.
      I thought the reported article was odd but the surrepticious manner in which it has been contrived and disguised is simply disgraceful. They've tried to create a story out of something that does not exist.
      Cristine Jennifer Shye
      ''Hi Christine
      Lovely to here from you again Please be my guest., Allways interested in your work.
      Meet up agaqin soon, do lunch
      Best whishes Charles''
      Carol Steel
      Former Member
      Under UK Law and Hate Crime, all transgender people (including transvestites/CD's) are protected and any incident/crime reported will be dealt with as a hate crime - there is no discrimination against transvestites in this area by any police authority in the UK.
      Cristine Jennifer Shye
      Although the law has not been tested with regards to transvestites it would seem that they do not fall into either strict category of trans gender or necessarily homosexual.Please quote the actual, section of the GRA. EHRC or any UK law that specifically mentions the term 'TRANSVESTITE' in relation to discrimination or hate crime.
      The considerations above are by an eminent UK Barrister.
      reproduce, as information only, none financial gain.'
      Cristine points out A simile. If the law was passed that Bannanas, had to be indivually wrapped in tin foil when sold, that does not mean that grapes , oranges or any other fruit would have to be wrapped in the same way'.
      Former Member
      I know for a fact Crissie that hate crimes against transvestites are recorded, treated and dealt with in exactly the same way as a crime against any other transsexual person. in the Devon and Cornwall Police Authourity area (and many other areas I am led to believe by our Chief Superintendent). They do not distinguish and both are recorded under hate crime statistics as either a hate incident or a hate crime. If serious enough the offender would be prosecuted.
      Carol Steel
      This post was edited by Former Member at April 6, 2013 11:50 pm BST
      Former Member
      Cristine, Shye (GS Admin) said:
      Although the law has not been tested with regards to transvestites it would seem that they do not fall into either strict category of trans gender or necessarily homosexual.
      Please quote the actual, section of the GRA. EHRC or any UK law that specifically mentions the term 'TRANSVESTITE' in relation to discrimination or hate crime.
      The considerations above are by an eminent UK Barrister.
      PS. I have under the HZ zones, requirement, contacted the original writer for permission to reproduce, as information only, none financial gain.'
      I'm only trying to assist your analysis of what is before you. I wasn't being critical if only offering constructive criticism. I like your work very much.
      Whatever the situation in Britain the context of your OP is an Australian case. Transvestites may not be specifically considered in UK Law but in Australia they are inclusive of the Law as it relates to &amp;amp;amp;amp;quot;crossdressers&amp;amp;amp;amp;quot;
      However, this statement is odd.
      Australian lawyers are now debating whether transvestites are protected in law. Why would they do that, the issue is clear and non sequitur. There is nothing in the act of Crossdressing that offends any law in mainland Australia or in most of the world. However, if I extend the present dialogue, I concede that your eminent UK Barrister has moved the incident to a British context as a pretext to raise the issue in UK Law. A bit of confusion on my part, so I won't be quoting any legal documents. lol
      Respectfully yours
      ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Cristine Jennifer Shye. BL
      2342 1‚ 0
      Chalice its a UK law forum, I am reading and quoting from the Gender Recognition act, the example quote above (with permission) was by a UK Barrister. As to IF transvestites fell into a protected group under UK law, not Australian law, Chinese law or any other foriegn law.
      It#s my understanding that Chief Constables do have discresionary powers where criminal charges are brought, to add ''hate crime'' as in threatening behavour, assault, criminal damage. nice to see Carols area is being proactive. The problem arisses and the question is under the terms and definitions of the discriniation Act. Under this ACT some offences against listed ''Gender (added Transexual/Transgendered undergoing supervised medical transiton),.. transvestites which is defined under various acts as, (Transvestism definition, the practice, especially of men, of wearing clothing usually associated with the opposite sex for psychological gratification. See more.) with an addage (not to be confused with TG's and TS's NHS directives, GRA, etc)'' So it is arguable if they have the same rights and protection under the various acts of criminal law and employment, goods and service aspect of the discrimination act. This would have to be brought under a civil presentation to court, A solicitor would make an application to court, as the case proceeded to the High court a barrister would make representation, IF a judge ruled in favour. it would set a legal precedent, the judge would give leave to appeal, if the appeal was not taken up and repealed by the house of lords, within the ''leave to appeal duration''. the term Transvestite would be added to all the aspects of law that was refered to or applicable.
      Hate crime by definition must show aspects of behavour to indicate it was directed agains a specific group or person, for what they are. ie ''I am going to smash your face in you tranny pervert'' threatening behavour. If the perp did smash the persons face in it would be Crimianl assault occasioning grevious bodily harm, end endorsed hate crime.
      Cristine Jennifer Shye. BL

      2342 1‚ 0
      This article is about the history of &amp;amp;amp;amp;quot;transvestism&amp;amp;amp;amp;quot;. For information about the sexual fetish, see transvestic fetishism.
      Not to be confused with Transgender or Transsexualism.
      Transvestism (also called transvestitism) is the practice of cross-dressing, which is wearing clothing traditionally associated with the opposite sex or gender. Transvestite refers to a person who cross-dresses; however, these are clinical terms that carry potentially negative connotations and/or implications of mental illness. Cross-dresser, a word that more accurately describes the behavior and avoids clinical or pathological implications, is the preferred term.[1]
      In some cultures, transvestism is practiced for religious, traditional and/or ceremonial reasons. For example, in India some male devotees of the Hindu god Krishna, especially in Mathura and Vrindavan, dress in female attire to pose as his consort, the goddess Radha, as an act of devotion.[7] In Italy, the Neapolitan femminielli (feminine males) wear wedding dresses, called the matrimonio dei femminielli (marriage of the femminielli), a procession takes place through the streets, a tradition that apparently has pagan origins.[8] many minor hate crimes are lodge under the harrassament act, on reporting the crime, the police would apply to the courts for a warrant. the person would be taken before the court and be given an order, any subsequent action against the same person/group they would be arrested for contempt of court and the initial charge would be added for consideration. for example firstly Threatening verbal abuse, Then followed up by spraying a persons car with ''dirty king tranny''
      A typical precedent was a case in Reading Crown Court, The rape of a transexaul, The defence at the time was that it was not relevant, because The term Vagina was refered to clinically and by definition, the sexual organ of a Natal female, so it did not apply. and asked that the charge be reduced to common assault. The Judge ruled. that the term Vagina should and in future be all inclusive. and a legal precedent was set.
      former Member
      Alright so let me test your expertise. Its not a trick question because I don't know the answer. What is the condition called, or is it even known, for males who look at themselves in a mirror and see someone of the opposite sex although the image is always inadequately female.
      ETA. I see what you're doing there. You'll just have to wait.
      I have made tentative enquiries about getting a portfolio done.

      I'll post something then. CB
      was edited by Former Member at April 8, 2013 12:56 pm BST
      Cristine Jennifer Shye. BL
      2342 1‚ 0
      Chalice, I'm not familiar with any official term to describe that, What a person believes themselves to be is the important issue here. not what they appear to others or what they see in a mirror. I should think that many suffer that particular aspect of their lives. I was born a boy perse and as a kid would look in the mirror and feel disgusted that I did not look like a boy. but people who ask a question and then state they don't know the answer usually think they do know the answer other wise why ask the question, just to make someone else look stupid, ignorant or try and prove they are more intelligent
      Former Member
      There is a variety of definitions of autogynephilia, or autogynophilia, that have been penned since Ray Blanchard first coined the term. Personally, I prefer the definition without sexual gratification attached to it. In other words, I can define autogynephilia outside of the paraphilias. (fetishes)
      I have never been repulsed by my own image but only sought to enhance it. However, I am detered by the prospects of being a man like those that surround me on a daily basis, and gratefully I am not like them.
      Your self-image is extremely important and there is an obscue quote that always comes to mine on rare occassions like this.
      Cristine Jennifer Shye. BL
      2342 1‚ 0
      I am familiar with Blanchards work Autogynephilia and autoandrophilia Blanchards work is somewhat controversial and in parts I find offensive and demeaning. Scientific criticism of the research and theory has come from John Bancroft, Jaimie Veale, Larry Nuttbrock, Charles Allen Moser, and others who argue that the theory is poorly representative of MtF transsexual people, reduces gender identity to a matter of attraction, is non-instructive, and that the research cited in support of the theory has inadequate control groups or is contradicted by other data. Supporters of the theory include J. Michael Bailey, Anne Lawrence, James Cantor, and others who argue that there are significant differences between the two groups, including sexuality, age of transition, ethnicity, IQ, fetishism, and quality of adjustment. The theory has been the subject of protests in the transsexual and larger LGBT community, although it has its supporters. The controversy over the distinction peaked among both transsexuals and clinicians with the publication of Bailey's The Man Who Would Be Queen in 2003. Following the publication of Bailey's book, Blanchard distinguished between the value of the theory as a behavioral description, versus as an explanation of transsexualism and that only further scientific research could resolve latter question
      .[ perhaps this should be taken up in the Transgender Psychology forum.] as its not really a law matter.
      Julia Ford
      Chalice Brendale said:
      ''Cristine I am good with that afterall you are the admin. This is a great piece Cris and although I've only been here 18 months it is the best I have seen you post. Perhaps that's because it strikes a chord with me and is what I believe to to be the core of my identity.
      I will follow it up. Thanks. Anyway, back to Transvestitism and UK Law.'' Chalice''
      Stupid moron Hypocryte
      Julia Ford
      Former Member
      You make a good point about the inclusion of transsexuals under the Law. Yesterday, at ACON, in discussion with the youth community liasion officer I made the point that awareness and acceptance were not enough. Being received goes beyound inclusion. Anyone can be part of a team and still not get a kick. Here is one of the respondents to the youth sexual health and well being survey.
      I'm currently working my way towards a Law degree, so I can eventually one day become a prosecutor, for gay right, and one day become a High Court Judge, just like Michael Kirby*. I want to help make Australia a better place for gay people and I know I will. I hope this survey helps make things better for gay youth. I was happy to do it.
      *Michael Kirby is an outspoken gay rights activist and advocate who used to sit on the High Bench. (emphasis mine)
      Cristine Jennifer Shye. BL
      2342 1‚ 0
      One does not become a prosecutor for rights, one becomes a defender of rights (when there is existing legislation protecting those rights.), when rights are violated against an established statute, when individuals, organisations or corporate groups break those laws. you can be a campaigner for rights, but you cannot prosecute people if the laws are not already in existence, but you said all the laws were all encompassing in Australia. I would have thought the Gays get enough attention and representation,, as a ''transsexual'' perhaps you should concentrate in that area a totally separate field and more complex, it incorporates, rights to medical treatment recognition, marriage laws, the right to change documentation, gender certificates, and change of gender. pensions, work, even rape and sexual motivated crimes.
      Cristine Jennifer Shye
      Another example of people who ignore facts and interpret ate things to suite their own way of thinking
      Got a bit heated and side tracked, but I think I got my point over in the end???
      To be successful at anything,especially law,one must have a sense of reason, the ability to recognise facts and an unbiased mind.
      Beyond most people in this debate, perhaps that is why there are so many former members. they cannot accept logic.

    • March 28, 2020 12:51 PM GMT

      Alexandra Stone
      I am being petitioned by my wife for a divorce on the grounds that our marriage has broken down irretrievably now that I have revealed I am transgender.
      She does not wish to wait for the two years required for a no-fault divorce to be granted or the two years needed to have the marriage annulled through the GRC process. She has instead chosen to argue that our divorce should be granted on the basis of my 'unreasonable behaviour'; given that it would now be 'unreasonable' for her to be expected to remain married to me since she originally married a man, and that she is heterosexual and does not wish to be married to a woman, and also that since we separated I have 'behaved unreasonably' by living full-time as a woman.
      I am completely sympathetic to her position and recognise that our marriage is now over. I also realise that the breakdown of our marriage was completely down to me revealing to her that I was transsexual. However, is it right for the Courts to consider this revelation to my wife and also the wish to seek medical treatment in itself grounds for 'unreasonable behaviour'? Is being a transsexual seeking medical treatment, which is a protected characteristic of the Equalities Act (2010), a valid reason for a quicker 'fault-based' divorce to be granted; potentially making me liable to pay all costs?
      I have no real problem in divorcing quickly. I really want to cause the least amount of anguish as possible. However, I'm really offended that the revelation about my Gender Identity to my wife and also that I wanted to see my doctor about it can be considered 'unreasonable behaviour' and so used against me in the courts. It seems unfair that divorces can be fast-tracked through the court system on this basis, given that it would take at least two years to do if no fault could be proved. This appears to me as direct discrimination against transsexuals and unfair. I would be happier if divorce would be permitted on a no-fault basis once a partner has revealed their intention of changing gender.
      My Solicitor has advised me to submit a counter petition if I feel aggrieved about the grounds used for divorce. She thinks this would counter the origonal petition and allow the courts to grant the divorce anyway, and in most cases the costs are then paid seperately. But my solicitor has warned me that if my counter petition fails, then I may have to pay all the costs myself.
      I have spoken to many people about this. Most seem to say I should just agree to the petition and get the whole thing over with as quickly as possible, even though the whole thing seems unfair. There seems very little on the Internet about this, and it’s difficult for me to decide what to do. I can't be the only one this has happened to, can I?

      Lucy Diamond
      No you are not the only one, not by a long way! My very dear friend had this happen to her, and it wasn't pretty, having read some of the accusations made by the ex-wife. But that's how the courts work; it's often not pretty.
      On the one hand, "unreasonable behaviour" seems very harsh. On the other hand one can understand a woman not wanting to stick around; this isn't what she signed up for, though personally I just think that is small-minded. So the courts will likely take the view that your "behaviour" is unreasonable in the sense that it is not conducive to a regular, healthy marriage.
      However you are not at fault simply by being transgender, and if these particular grounds are considered an "at fault divorce" then it is indeed discrimination against transsexuals. We can't help the way we are, we are born like this, and if a husband were to suffer some freak accident or health problem that meant he could no longer fulfill his "marital duties", it wouldn't be considered unreasonable behaviour. In both cases, the husband can't help their circumstances.
      But the court could take the view that it was unreasonable to go ahead with the marriage without telling the future wife about your transgenderness. Although I'm sure there's no such word...
      Having seen the dismal way in which my friend was apparently regarded by the court, cast aside with disdain by her wife, restricted access to her children and eventually having them turn against her - I'd really like to see someone challenge these grounds for divorce in court. It could be a landmark case, but I have little confidence at this time that such a challenge would be succesful; one would need a very good solicitor au fait with TG issues and rights, and money with which to gamble.
      If it was me I'd just want it over quickly and wouldn't fight it. Whilst ashamed of my own cowardness, I also know there is a lot for a newly out TG to be getting on with. So perhaps your energies could be better spent elsewhere, rather than fighting your wife and the system in general.
      But good luck with whatever you do, this is bound to be a difficult time and I really feel for you.

      Cristine J.Shye
      As one of the reasons for divorce in UK divorce law unreasonable behaviour is by far the most common. The main reason for this is that it allows quick divorce. Three of the other grounds involve delays of between 2 and 5 years and the other, adultery, may not apply in every case. Divorce advice for men does often involve explaining that you do not need wait for your wife to issue a divorce petition. Almost all spouses can in practice rely upon unreasonable behaviour as a ground for divorce.
      Do bear in mind that divorce is private. Details of unreasonable behaviour in an undefended divorce petition are not divulged to the general public and so no-one but the parties themselves need ever know what was in the petition. Divorce proceedings and the divorce reasons are private. Indeed, it is quite common for the Respondent (the person who receives the petition as opposed to the person who issues it) to agree not to defend the divorce on condition that no use is made of the lack of defence to allegations of unreasonable behaviour in any other proceedings (such, for instance, as those relating to children or the matrimonial property).
      The Respondent might also want to make it a condition of not defending that there is some agreement as to who bears the cost or the division of costs.
      Very often clients ask what constitutes "unreasonable behaviour". Obviously, it covers extreme types of behaviour such as habitual drunkenness or violence but it is by no means necessary to allege anything near as serious in a divorce petition. In fact, because no-one likes receiving a petition based on their unreasonable behaviour, it is very often sensible to keep the allegations to the bare minimum that will suffice to obtain the divorce even in circumstances where very much more could be added. A few paragraphs are normally sufficient and in a case where a marriage has in fact irretrievably broken down it is unusual not to be able to find some instances of unreasonable behaviour which will suffice for the purposes of obtaining decree nisi. It is important to understand that the courts are not too demanding about this - particularly where both spouses want a divorce.
      Naturally, if the parties are not agreed on divorce the requirements of the courts are stricter because the allegations will be subject to scrutiny but in the overwhelming majority of cases the allegations are unchallenged because very few divorces are ever defended in fact.
      People often think they can get a divorce based simply upon "irreconcilable differences". The truth of the matter is that this usually means "unreasonable behaviour" and in order to obtain a divorce on the ground of unreasonable behaviour one has to comply with the rules applicable to that particular ground including any time limits.
      Examples of unreasonable behaviour given to lawyers with successful outcomes for divorce include:
      A husband hiding a tape recorder in the bedroom and his wife’s handbag to record her conversations
      Irresponsibility with money
      An unsociable husband making his wife feel guilty when she wanted to go out with her friends
      A cross dressing husband after he decided to have a sex change
      Withdrawing all of the family savings (£40,000) from the bank and burning it in the bedroom
      A husband who was so work obsessed that he filled the bedroom with so many files that his wife couldn’t get into the room
      Divorce in England & Wales is based on a marriage having "broken down irretrievably ". But there is a complication. This breakdown must be proved by evidencing only one of five "facts" laid down by the law. They are Adultery, Unreasonable Behaviour, Desertion, Two years’ separation with consent and **Five years’ separation without consent. (if the wife/spouse becomes embittered) if she withdraws her own petition**

      Alexandra Stone
      Thank you so much for your reply. I've been thinking about this for months now, and you've pretty much summed up everything that I been!
      After a LOT of thought, I've decided to contest the divorce, if only so that I can have my say. I think this would upset me for the rest of my life if I didn't stand up for myself on this issue. As the Law stands, there is no shortcut to divorce on the grounds of being transgender. I think if there was, and given how much I love my wife, how much she and our family are hurting, and also how important this is for her to have the marriage recognised to have broken down irretrievably in Law, I would readily agree to a quick divorce on those grounds; and perhaps the English Marriage Laws need to be updated to reflect this. But unfortunately, there are no such grounds, and it just feels unreasonable in itself and actually a very Lazy way out to accept that by seeking medical help and revealing that I am transexual to my family and friends that this could in itself be construed by the courts as demonstrating 'unreasonable behaviour'.
      I think I just want to be treated fairly under the law and for the law to protect me if necessessary as I transition.
      After some searching (and a trip to Sparkle!) I found a Solicitor who has an interest in LGBT issues and Family Law. Her Name is Beveley Jones and she is a partner of dwf Solicitors in Liverpool ( 0151 907 3372) and has agreed to act on my behalf (Once I started asking my previous high street solicitor about issues around Equality Law, she quickly recommeded that I find someone else).
      My main problem I think is of course financial. Fundementally I would like the divorce to ended on a no-fault basis, and not on the grounds of my unreasonable behaviour. If this outcome is not possible then I would be prepared to take the matter further. I can just about afford to pay Solicitors to help prepare my legal documents and provide me with initial advice. But when it goes to court I will have to represent myself. If it goes any further I would not have the funds to pay for specialist advice around Equalities Law and cannot afford a Barrister. I have thought about joining my local university library and having a look into applicable case law etc, but I think what I really need to do is to find is an academic who has an interest in Equality and Family Law who could point me in the right direction.
      I have contacted Stonewall, who have just started to become interested in Gender Identity issues, but so far had no reply, although I get the feeling that they themselves feel very inexperienced in this area, but may be looking at possible campaigning issues for the future.Beaumont are brill, but any questions are passed onto their region (volunteer reps). I already know my regional rep very well through the Machester Concord (Rach is lovely:), but as a volunteer her knowledge on this area is understandably very limited.Any other suggestions would be gratefully recieved, and thanks again!

      Cristine J.Shye
      What you could do, if your wife is ameniable, is enter into a collaborative engagement procedure, you both sit down with your solicitors and discuss the innapropriate unreasonable behaviour aspect presentation, you both agree a format to be adhered to, that will under advice, be acceptable to a ruling judge, to grant a divorce. sharing costs and avoiding protracted arguments and soaring litigation costs.
      Despite the apparent fault based divorce process, the approach of collaborative law enables a divorcing couple to meet their goal and achieve an amicable divorce.Regarding trans issues and marriage and subsequent divorce, I think in future with more self awareness and education, we will see less of these sad incidents, with the ''If I ignore it, it will go away syndrome'
      Thinking of a counter argument, medical conditions should not be considered as unreasonable behavour but rather"irreconcilable differences" I think a precedent was set with a diganosis of bi-polar.which could be submitted at a collaborative engagement procedure, you would realy need a more experienced divorce/ family matters solicitor to give a view on that aspect, divorce is not my specialist subject, barristers are very expensive if it was refered to the crown court, for a legal ruling.. It also depends on a Judges view of what the petitioner regards as unreasonable behaviour.
      This has got me going, been up half the night buried in books, making phone calls, firstly I am advised I cannot give you direction, divorce not being my forte, and a one master loyalty clause in my contract. What I have stated so far is a matter of record. If you send me an IM with you email address I will give you my contact details, your solicitor, or the solicitor you mentioned can contact me, I can give details of medical conditions both inherited and genetic that can cause a person to be transgendered, I was born with such a condition and have done vast amounts of research, in law, the GRA you do not have to demonstrate you suffer any of these conditions only that such causes exist as a maybe, that your behavour to you is natural and not unreasonable. Direction is for your solicitor to advise you on if this would be a viable course of action. perhaps setting a legal precedent.
      Alexandra Stone
      I've recieved and acknowleged my wife's divorce petition, indicating that I wish to defend her petition on the grounds that I don't think it's reasonable for a divorce to be granted on a fault-basis (i.e. quicker) simply because I am transexual and seeking medical treatment.
      After a lot of thought, I have decided to post my wifes Statement of Case, my answer to this petition and my cross petiton on this forumhere, so that others within the transgender community can consider my arguments and (hopefully?) offer me some support. Obviously I feel quite alone, very saddened by the whole thing and a bit vulnerable at the moment. I would appreciate your thoughts on whether you think my petition and answer can be improved, or whether you think what I am doing is right or a waste of time and money. For the time being, I feel that although the end result will be the same - that the courts will agree to the divorce, at least I feel slightly more in control of my divorce, and that I have had a right of reply. I don't think I could live with myself if I didn't, and for me, I think this is a very important part of my personal transition. Here goes.....

      Cristine J.Shye
      Big mistake, a counter petition in my considered opinion. (returning to case law and examples of unreasonable behaviour) Her petition would be considered reasonable, she mairried you, a male, the fact she cannot continue to support your relationship in a lesbian contex is understandable.
      Gender dysphoria is a recognised medical condition, in the opinion of eminent therapists and specialist researchers, there is no cure, the urgess are uncontrollable, aversion therapy has been proved to be a failure in the past, so a medical condition should not be labled unreasonable behaviour, is it a volountary aspect of behaviour? who can say which individual can control this aspect of their behavour, perhaps some control it for a number of years, suffering in silence and ignorance, unhappy, finally having to succumb to the urges to be normal per se, inner happiness is a right under the human rights act. being deemed in a divorce as being a person of unreasonable behaviour, is in my opinion being classed as found guilty of the allegations put forward against a person, of course in law in this country there is no actual decision based on ireconsilable differences in divorce as mentioned above in the basic rules of five. That's why we need a precedent, case law, if not apealed would be an ammendment to the marriage act and the GRA.if you push for the collaborative engagement, with with a no fault basis. There is already an ammendment that by mutual consent an existing marriage can now be converted in the records as a same sex marriage, doing away with the temporary GRC and annulment. But a spouses veto was introduced,allowing the plaintif/petitioner to object to an anulment during the tempory GRC when the parties do not whish to remain together, forcing a divorce. in that case the petitioner then becomes the respondant. It's is my opinion that this contravenes article 10 of the EHRC the power of one human rights over another and against UK equlities act, so in the case of transgendered people, there should be a mutal annulment procedure based on incompatabilty, as soon as both parties request it. on a no fault basis.
      BUT there is the option of Matter of first impression
      First impression (known as primae impressionis in Latin) is a legal case in which there is no binding authority on the matter presented. Such a case can set forth a completely original issue of law for decision by the courts, which will then set a precedent for similar cases if a judge so rules..
      Ratio decidendi (Latin plural rationes decidendi) is a Latin phrase meaning "the reason" or "the rationale for the decision". The ratio decidendi is "the point in a case that determines the judgment" or "the principle that the case establishes"
      In other words, ratio decidendi is a legal rule derived from, and consistent with, those parts of legal reasoning within a judgment on which the outcome of the case depends.
      Rule of Inference. Base conclusions on what is already known and proven or can be reasonably implied from all known facts.
      Do not forget that annulment on recieving your temporary GRC is not automatic, a spouse has the power of veto as explained above, an embittered spouse can insist that the issue proceeds to divorce. an ammendment to the marriage act regarding transexuals 2013 regarding the issue of a full GRC.

      Lucy Diamond
      Cristine is hugely more expert than me in these sort of matters, but I think I'm thinking the same thing. Your wife's defence of your cross-petition does not read well, and no, I do not think they necessarily cancel each other out, but without seeing your cross petition in the first place, it's hard to give a balanced opinion.
      Cris is right though in her last sentance, and it looks to me like any attempt to defend the accusation that you have behaved unreasonably by claiming that it was your wife who has behaved unreasonably is doomed to failure. From the court's point of view: your wife files a divorce because you announced you wish to be a woman from now on, and you claim that she is being unreasonable about it? Your best bet in that scenario would be to hope for a TS judge who might rule in your favour!
      What I think you really want though, is not to apportion blame upon your wife (as her defence suggests you have done), but to show that neither party was to blame. The traditional divorce court is probably not equipped to deal with what could basically amount to a change in the law; and this may be the only way to adequately defend your case, which I do think is sound if approached in the right way. But as I said, your wife's defence to your cross petition does not read well, I can't see a regular divorce court deciding in your favour, or even ruling an "equal blame" situation.
      I'm no expert, but I've been to court and it's not pretty. Did you suggest your wife was partly to blame in your cross petition? I think this is the crux of the matter. She wasn't to blame, and neither were you, but it appears she is now defending herself against your accusations that it was partly her fault. She'll probably win that argument in a regular divorce court.

    • March 1, 2020 7:05 PM GMT
    • I found out i was bi at 15 wearing my friends sisters panties stockings still like wearing them

    • November 5, 2019 5:37 PM GMT
    • Never had a quick one-nighter, and all three meets I had planned through Plenty Of Fish fizzled. Like others here, though, I had a day ready for me, and blew them off without a care. I've had far too many local t-girls make excuses to not meet, so don't often make dates - and two of them who did show up just wanted to shag - not what I had in mind. But a few girls have shown up, we shopped, munched, and got tipsy together, and they're now more than just friends. Yay!

      But having made that huge decision to sleep with a man-friend (with milady) changed my life for the better. Now we spend quality time having happy sex, as often or more as with milady. A bit of a mental/emotional shift going from Top with girlfriend, to total Bottom with him!

    • December 9, 2019 2:09 PM GMT
    • I do love driving whilst dressed, but i do drive with more caution, so has not to draw too much attention to me, but the longer i am out, the more confident i get, and i love wearing heels whilst driving, also a short skirt, i love looking down at my legs and feeling very lucky i can do this, i have just bought myself a sports car, so getting in and out is a lovely feeling, i try to be very ladylike off course, but cant help showing off quite a lot of leg. i sometimes think other motorists are looking at the car rather than me, but you never know

    • December 9, 2019 11:56 AM GMT
    • I always kept a pair of shoes for driving in flats or ballerinas as too drive in heels can be tricky.
      Tried it once, not good. The scuffing your shoes can get from the driving makes them look bad. So, change the shoes and prevent marks. As for boobs, after my first trip out with over the top size boobs, my friend advised me to lower their size. This I did and drove Police style that's moving the wheel turning left you would pull with your left hand and push with the right hand. Crossing over arms can get you if you are close to the wheel, causing wheel rash on the clothes. Marks made by the wheel as it spins pass your clothes. Practice, observe other Women driving and take it steady.

      Being pulled in a road check by the police one night was not on my agenda. You have to expect things might happen and plan for the event. Getting chatted up by a rep mobile when two of us were in the car off to the BS meeting was fun. I just developed a female tunnel vision and my passenger she was looking. "Stop looking at them" Why? We lost them at some lights. Good old V6 Ford that was. Laughing after when she said you were worried, "it's alright for you, they get your clothes off and it's all there waiting" came my reply.

    • November 16, 2019 8:30 PM GMT
    • if my hair will grow back i'll get castrated

    • November 2, 2019 5:24 PM GMT
    • I am Shafty.

    • November 1, 2019 5:51 PM GMT
    • <blockquote><strong><a href="/se4/profile/RozalyneRichards">Rozalyne Richards </a> said:</strong><br />Roz is one letter up from my real name of Roy then i leathered it to Rozalyne I've always liked the name Richards from Wendy Richards of eastender's that's how i got my name x</blockquote><br />

      she was nice